Saturday, April 26, 2008

Crossroads

It has been ages since I have blogged, but it seems timely to put in a thought or two while I’m at crossroads. I was reading through my old blogs, and it really brought back memories of how I felt at a certain time, which is priceless.

This year has been a whirlwind for me. It started with a massive world travel, something that I’ve always wanted to try. I just love to travel, a very expensive hobby, unfortunately. But there is just so much to see, so much to experience and taste how a different culture is like. I suppose you could say that I tie it very closely to my escapism thoughts (running away from reality for a bit). Anyhow, I’ve kinda tasted for a short stint what it’s like to travel for work. Not half as glamorous as it may sound, but I can say at least I have tried. You just know that you have traveled too much when….

- You spend more time in airports than in your own room
- You have more than 1 frequent flyer card
- You don’t mind spending money on travel related items (especially trolley bags and more trolley bags!)
- You carry so many different currencies in your wallet, you get confused
- You can memorize airport procedures
- You can memorize all the announcements …”An aerotrain is arriving…”
- You take more than an hour to do your expenses claims for the month

I’m sure many people who have traveled for work excessively would testify to that. :) Ironically, I am glad to be home! I suppose too much of something, makes you sick (e.g. taking more than 20 flights in 2 months).

Why do people always ask, “What do you want to do in life?” . I find that a very tough question to answer. Apparently most people still don’t know what they want to do in their fourties. I’m in my twenties and I am supposed to know what I am supposed to do? Anyway, it is a very confusing time – “finding your place in the world”, “wanting to make a difference or an impact”… etc. I’m an idealist. I dream and think a lot, could I be a full time dreamer? The problem with idealists is that they do not take much action and refuse to face reality (or it’d take a lot longer to hit the ground). Well, I would say that I’m still making my descent.

Steve Jobs said that the dots will all connect somehow. I truly believe in that. Everything happens for a reason, it all leads to finding out your real purpose. Even though in each situation, you may ask “Why am I in this situation? Why did I get myself into this”? If I hadn’t tasted the short stint travel for work, I may still think that it is something that will be fulfilling for me. Now I realize that it comes with a lot of costs. If I hadn’t had bad experience in relationships, I wouldn’t have been able to make wiser decisions and appreciative of my current relationship & what is truly important. If I haven’t gone through bad management, I wouldn’t learn what good management and leadership is. I do hope to remind myself to be more optimistic and worry less, to live in the present and not float too long in the ‘future’ that I have imagined (with many complex scenarios and what-ifs).

It is often the fear that we have instilled upon ourselves that is the real obstacle. The fear of others’ perception, of our Asian society that puts a lot of emphasis on ‘money, prestige and position’ - what’s up with people boasting all the time about how “well” they are doing? I utterly cannot stand that. I believe that if you are good at what you do, you don’t need to announce to the world, people will know. And there are too many people in our twenties (myself included), living beyond our means. We live the life that we were brought up in because our parents have made many sacrifices and effort to get to that stage (like working hard for over 20 years) – and yet, we have just started off our careers and living as though we are earning as much as them. It’d definitely be an interesting study of our generation and what this path leads us to? Many of us do not understand the true value of earning a living, there is no thought about long-term sustainability, in short, refusing to grow up. Well some are lucky to have a fortune that can last through their lifetime, but for the others, it’s definitely time to wake up.

I hope I’d be hitting the ground soon… (but then again, what’s life without big dreams? *wink*)

4 Comments:

At 7:34 AM, Blogger ahbonk said...

Did you know that I had my RSS reader check your blog everyday?! Now it's finally updated!

Hey, glad that you have achieved your dreams of travelling the world (sorta). Just take your time finding your dreams, it will come to ya. Don't listen to Steve Jobs though, he dreamt of doing stuff since he was a teen! XD

 
At 7:38 AM, Blogger ahbonk said...

Oh forgot to mention...

I miss you!! When can we meet up, huh?!

 
At 5:23 AM, Blogger emeryz said...

omg ahbonk!! im so touched.. hahaha that u got my blog on the RSS reader. :) yes, yes, u can arrange meetup, just buzz me.

 
At 12:30 PM, Anonymous yuejon said...

someone finally started blogging again... careful what you wish for eh? i'm tired of all this travelling too haha...

 

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